Perfect mom?

Thinking back to my life so far, there are certain things I’m not proud of. I haven’t been "good" all the time, I know, and I wish sometimes I had chosen differently. But we can’t change the past, can we? Free will we are given, and although we dont mean to do wrong, we do.

Now, I would like to be a good mom for Lucia. A perfect mom? Naaa i dont think so. There’s no “how to” so I’ll just have to follow my instinct and try to do the best I can. I would do anything for our little angel. I think about all these times when my mom used to tell me “one day, as mom you will understand”. I think I know now what she meant.

How to be sure you are doing the right thing for them? Like, should I take her on my arms every time she cries? Or should I let her cry a bit? Hard to say. Maybe is this special bond between a mom and her baby; but when she cries, my whole body responds. I just can’t ignore that!

These little ones, they can’t speak, so the only way to draw our attention is by crying. Somehow, you learn to distinguish if they are hungry, if I they need a clean diaper, if the are cold or if they simply need a hug for comfort. If you take some time, you will learn to catch these signs. But (of course) sometimes you’re tired, and need some rest – difficult to make a new born understand this. So it’s not always easy... but that’s the way things are!

But then you know, they smile back to you and you see that they are happy, and none of the rest matters anymore.

Lucia is starting to be more active now; like she’s aware of her hands and would like to start using them. Here she’s playing, well it looks more like a box combat, but still cute.